Some people, when they get invited to a night out with their friends upon short notice, are thrilled. They accept the invitation willingly, already looking forward to it and thinking “what a great night tonight will be!”
Honestly, I have no idea how such people do that. Where do you find the energy? The enthusiasm? I’d spent a tiring day out with my best friend at Go Ape (a tree-top obstacle course thing) today and on the way home I received a random text from one of my friends asking if I wanted to go to TGI Friday’s tonight and then “who knows what”, as he put it. My literal reaction upon first reading the text was “Are you fucking kidding me?” I then groaned and moaned quite a lot, wondered whether I could make up a good enough reason to decline, decided that I couldn’t make up a good enough reason, and ended up saying that I’d go.
It’s now just past eleven and I got home a few minutes ago, but to be honest I really couldn’t endure any more. The group of friends I went with I haven’t spoken to in about a year and overall I didn’t really have a great time. When we were at TGI’s they kept asking me just why I wasn’t ordering the burger with Jack Daniels sauce instead of the boring pasta and I was just screaming in my head that I’M NOT ORDERING THE GODDAMN BURGER WITH THE GODDAMN JD SAUCE BECAUSE I DON’T FUCKING WANT IT.
Eventually I ordered the pasta while they all had the burger and after about an hour and a half of slightly awkward conversation we went over to the bar. By now I was really quite ready to go home, but no, they insisted that I had to “try at least one drink” because it just doesn’t compute in teenagers’ heads that a fellow teenager doesn’t like alcohol and therefore doesn’t drink. So, I was forced into ordering a sizeable amaretto (which I drank very slowly because firstly, it wasn’t that nice, and secondly, my friends were taking ages to drink their cocktails too). While we were at the bar I eventually tuned out to what they were saying and just watched the bartender (who was quite good-looking, I must add) mix other customers’ cocktails. Also, the colour-order arrangement of the spirits behind the bar pleased my inner neat compulsion and the skull-shaped vodka bottles were fascinating. The sky blue bottles of SKYY vodka looked decidedly evil in their simple bottles and the wide, brown bottles of whisky reminded me too much of the endless whisky bottles my Dad used to have lined up in his kitchen.
Anyway, by about half ten we left the bar and my friend suggested that we go back to his, but that was just too much for me and I made a semi-plausible excuse to leave and headed home. I was tired by that point anyway, so the prospect of spending a further few hours at someone’s house was practically hell. So now I’m home in bed, nice and comfy and glad that I’m not out at my friend’s house.
I really do feel sometimes like I’m a 70 year-old in a 19 year-old’s body, because I just don’t have the interest or energy for all this socialising and bar-going business. I simply do not see the point at all in drinking, because why would you want to spend so much money on drinks, only to get drunk and then forget what you did? To me the whole thing’s just incomprehensible and I know I’m going to have an extremely tough time at university explaining to people why I don’t want to go out and why I don’t want to go drinking with them. I think I’ll just have to hide in my room all the time and hope that I’ll stumble across the one other person on the whole campus who doesn’t drink. I can just see it now: by the time I leave university I’ll have no entertaining stories about wild nights out. But I don’t really care. I don’t enjoy staying out late and drinking, so why should I waste my money on it? Why waste an hour’s salary on a glass of liquid?
My god I am literally the most boring person I know. I don’t like socialising, I don’t drink, I don’t like dancing/clubbing…my idea of a fun night is to sit in bed and write or read and listen to music. Tonight I spent £16 on a meal which wasn’t very nice and a drink that did absolutely nothing for me and overall the night wasn’t even very enjoyable. Anyone listening to me would think I’m the saddest, most boring, empty person they’d ever met. But I don’t really care.
Anyway, in other news I went out for my first 6:30AM run this morning. I’m planning on running on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and this morning I surprised myself because apparently I’m not as unfit as I thought I was. The river was lovely, as it always is early in the morning, and I managed to get this great photo:
When I ran regularly in two years ago I used to be able to do five miles plus sprint training within 45 minutes, but it took me an hour today, which is slightly disappointing. I reckon that eventually, perhaps by the end of the summer holidays, I’ll be able to get it back down to 45 minutes.
Also in other news I wrote around 3,500 words of a possible new story last night. I’m hesitant to call it a new story because over the past week or so I’ve written about three openings for possible new stories and none of them have gone anywhere. I always say that I’d like to carry a certain on, but it never happens. So I’m not going to say anything about this latest one – I’ll just see where it goes.